Moving On After A Friendship Breakup

It's completely normal to outgrow your friends. Share on Facebook Personal growth might mean leaving behind old friends.

It can be painful when female friendships end — but at the same time, if the relationship has become stressful or frustrating, it can also feel like a relief. We know that when one door closes another opens, and it's important to stay focused on quality gal pals who are positive-minded while bringing out your best.

When you're truly interested in quality friends, you probably won't have 30 of them, so it's natural that as we mature, friends fade into the past. A study by NBC News shows most people have only two true friends. That might seem like a small number until we consider who we really trust with our innermost feelings. If you have more than two quality girlfriends, that's great. If you have fewer than two meaningful friendships, don't worry: there are ways to cultivate more.

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Social media like Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, and Pinterest can be great places to develop surface-level, online friends. In fact, it has been my source for meeting some of my very best girlfriends, who I treasure with all my heart. Just as you can use an online dating site to meet a great guy for a couple of dates or meet the one that develops into a real relationship or even marriage, you can meet like-minded, quality female friends online as well.

Sometimes, you can upgrade your current friendships. Over time and with effort, a casual friend or concert, movie or hiking buddy can turn into someone with whom you share your innermost thoughts. Think about your friends and consider working toward a deeper bond with one or more of them. Trust your gut feeling: being confident in yourself and your values will help you attract the right kind of friend. (If you'd like to learn more about tapping into that inner sense of self, you can read this article). 

Over the course of my own friendships, I've realized that when they end it doesn't mean one person is better than the other, but rather, we were simply moving in different life directions. That's not to say friends must have the same goals in life, but sometimes people are so different that communication and simultaneous personal growth are a challenge. That's when it's time to let go. Since it can be quite painful to lose a friend, this is very important to recognize.

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As we grow and mature, we need different support systems in our lives. One particular friend may be a perfect fit for three years, after which you may want to move on to someone who can take you further in your new direction. Another friend could be a great fit for 30 years or longer! If you're both growing in the same direction, enjoy the stability and camaraderie that comes with solid, long-term female friendships. Keep reading...

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